Why People Cheat

Relationships are like the children’s story about Goldilocks and the Three Bears; everyone is like Goldilocks searching for a bed that is just right, not too hard and not too soft. We all have had our experiences with cheating whether we have been the cheater or the all-knowing or unsuspected victim. Most people who want to know why people cheat are usually clueless as to the many mental illnesses associated with cheating; for instance bipolar disorder. They also forget that cheating can also come from what one has learned as a child from watching those around them deal with relationships. In addition, there is the widely held belief that cheating comes from things we do in the relationship that cause one to say, “I can do better with someone else.”

Cheating robs you of your mind, body, and soul. One day you are thinking this man or woman is all yours and you are reveling in the wonderful ways he or she makes you feel and then as the days, grow into weeks, and the weeks turn into years, you find yourself wondering why is this person acting differently toward you? Some cheaters say they cheat because they get bored in the relationship, others say they just can’t stay committed, and then those who are self-centered say, “I do it because he doesn’t give me what I want. She doesn’t make me feel as good as the other one does.” Whatever the reason, cheating is cruel and when one knows that he or she has a problem with staying committed and has a long history of hurting people because of it, he or she should get help.

Cheating kills family relationships, causes disease, corrodes trust, cost too much money, and contributes to the breakdown of morals. How can one teach their child not to steal, lie, or kill when he or she is stealing another person’s spouse, lying about their whereabouts, and killing their family? The cheater will quickly argue, but you don’t understand. We can all relate to the times our partners have said or did something to make us wish that we had never met them, but does that give us an excuse to cheat on them? One will reason that he or she doesn’t love the person they are seeing, that their spouse is most likely cheating on them, and so on. However, would two wrongs make the reason for cheating right? Of course not, does that mean your partner will suddenly be the man or woman you always wanted, because you cheated on them? Not hardly.

Most cheaters never planned on cheating “it just happened” as some will say. Well we all know that nothing in this life just happens, behind everything there is a process, a plan, a designer, no matter how chaotic. He or she allowed him or herself to be led down the path to cheat and although this person may not have planned it that way subconsciously someone wanted something to happen. He or she spent more time consulting with the guy or girl at work, in the neighborhood or at the gym about their relationship ills then they did talking about their issues with their mate. He or she may reason, “Well she doesn’t understand me.” It’s up to you to make her understand you. This person may have gone out on far too many lunch dates then they should. He or she may have often kept in contact with one another via email, phone or both. They are more personal than professional and often put themselves in situations that will make it challenging for them to say no to temptation. Most importantly, they allowed this person to rule their minds with their sweet words, attractive physique, and anything else that caused them to wish that their partner was more like so and so.

Cheating can be prevented if one sincerely wants to fight the temptation; however, if they want to be lead by: the stare, sweet words, warm sensation over the body, tingling between the legs, the invite for a bite to eat, the desire to help the damsel in distress and all the other things that lead to the path to cheat then they ought to be prepared for the consequences. Their partner is not going to sit idly by and just allow things to just happen or keep happening; he or she will make the cheater’s life very difficult. Cheaters everywhere should be advised that there is a high price to pay. From losing your partner who is the mother or father of your children to losing all your assets, there are many famous and not-so famous people that are wallowing in regret. The “if onlys” in life are plaguing their minds as you read this. “If only I hadn’t cheated…If only I would have kept walking…If only had I said no…” The grass didn’t turn out to be greener on the other side in most situations. If anything, the cheater finds out that the grass wilts very fast. The mistress now suspects that he is cheating on her with the wife. The unfaithful husband assumes that the mistress will cheat on him with his co-workers or friends. No one trusts one another. If anything, they find themselves right back in the situation with this new person that they were with the old. They fuss, argue, lie to one another, and most importantly, they don’t respect one another. How can you respect a person that is just as bad as you? He or she lied to their partner on the side, took their money and bought the one they cheated with something, and kept any and everything they could a secret from their partner, so what makes one think that they are going to be true to you?

Society seems to have a solution for some of the most complex challenges when it comes to technology, but when it comes to human behavior they don’t have a cure. They can’t give you something to give to you or your mate that will keep you from looking at someone else and wondering, “What would it be like to be with him or her?” They can only give you various reasons like this article provides on why, but it is up to the one who is cheating to do something about the illness that keeps him or her wanting to stray, the past childhood that has him or her emotionally unavailable but all too willing to have sex, or the issues of being self-centered and expecting everyone else to dance by the beat of his or her drum or else which is usually cheating. Until women and men stand up and tell these cheaters, “No, I will not be a part of your game.” The cheaters will continue to manipulate, misuse, and abuse whoever comes in his or her path.