Dating Advice, Relationship Problems

Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: The Wish for the Pain to Stop : Holiday seasons are being utilized for all the wrong reasons when it comes to volatile relationships .  Buy one's abuser as much as he o...

Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: It's Not Over Once You Leave - Abusive Men, Women ... : We saw recently what one can do when a handgun is in the wrong hands.  In the San Bernardino shooting  involving an abusive husband and his ...

Abuse Might Go Into Hiding for the Holidays

Do you feel suffocated in a relationship?  Is the partnership all about your mate?  Do you often feel powerless and frustrated?  Check out audio by inspirational speaker and author Nicholl McGuire on Sutros.  Podcast available here:  http://sutros.com/songs/47231-in-relationship-with-controlling-person October is domestic violence awareness month.

Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: Things are Never the Same - First Insult, Slap, Ki... : You don't understand how did we go from talking about something so simple to blowing up.  Two people had personal qualms with the other...

Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: Attentive, Common Interests, Loving, Sexual, Intox... : Watch for signs...the early days of meeting one's abuser. Narcissists, borderline personalities, anti-socials all exploit people! ...

Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: The Honeymoon Period - The Delusion of Valentine's... : Many couples will take off the boxing gloves for Valentine's Day depending on how long they have been together.  The abusive one will p...

So, you have met someone in a club, in the park or you and him/her were introduced by a friend. You have gone out with that person on a couple of dates and that person seems so perfect, so right! You decide to take this dating to the next level, so you start a relationship with this person. After months of seeing this person, you decide to move in with him/her; next thing you know, you are being abused by that person. You can evade this whole scenario every time you go out on a date and trust that person that you are considering having a serious relationship with. Remember, many people are not honest about who they are until they are in deep in a relationship. Now, you should not be scared when it comes to dating but you should be careful, here are some tips on how to spot an abuser. You can spot an abuser on your first 3-5 dates with that person, as long as you listen correctly. A date is all about knowing a person, not their whole life but at least the most important details and w...

Ladies, here is a news flash for you. You know this already, but I am officially confirming that men do not respond well, if at all, to nagging. If you want something from a man and you have been reduced to nagging him to get it, you stand a better change of a winning a snow ball fight in hell. A reader of mine, who we will call Julie emailed me recently saying she was simply exhausted with trying to get her husband to help out with the housework. She admitted she was constantly nagging him, however, no matter how, or how many times she pleaded with him, nothing. He simply did not respond. Julie, who works full time and takes care of two children and the house has come to a breaking point. Although she isn't actually considering leaving, she is actually considering threatening him with a separation. Should she resort to threats??? NO!!! First of all, threatening to leave a marriage when you simply don't mean it is a huge mistake. Secondly, her husband probably wouldn't even...

Jealousy is a common problem that couples present when they go to counseling. When one partner chooses jealous behaviors, the dynamics of the relationship change. They are no longer a couple in an Adult Relationship. Now they are caught in a cycle of Investigator and Suspect. The Investigator spends an enormous amount of energy checking up on the Suspect, who may or may not be doing anything reprehensible. The Suspect spends time defending and explaining his/her behaviors. They are locked in a pattern which will destroy their relationship and they usually don’t what to do. Both partners are miserable playing this game. The game is all about Control. "If I don’t check up on her, she'll make me look stupid" or "He'll make a fool of me." People who choose jealous behaviors may not realize that their behavior looks pretty silly or even crazy. Their partner didn't "make" them look stupid. I was actually told by several women that "all men...

Everyone around you has told you get married to your girlfriend, boyfriend or fiancé and you would like to, but you seem a bit apprehensive. There are obvious reasons why you are not ready and then there are some that aren't so obvious. The information contained in this article will help you uncover what has been bothering you about marrying your partner and why it is best to just put off your marriage plans. One. The Ex You are still involved with a previous mate. When you find yourself still doing the following: helping them whenever they need you, going out to eat with them, visiting them at their home, speaking to them intimately over the phone, emailing them about your personal life and inviting them to check out your Internet web pages and even worse still being married, you are not ready. Two. Past Memories You often think of the "good ole' days." Some people enjoy the memories of their single life, so much in fact, that it depresses them to think that ...

Having problems in your relationship? Are you the one who is to blame for the majority of the issues that have recently surfaced in your marriage? Maybe it was a mood swing contributed to PMS or menopause or maybe you have been really stressed out lately. If so, then the following tips will help you make some quick improvements in your marriage, before your man starts thinking you are no longer interested in him. 1) Overcrowding your husband's personal space? If you have been breathing down his neck on a variety of issues and not seeing any results and he has told you to back off, why aren't you doing it? Then again, maybe you are so in love with him that you want to know his every move, of course he will understand, right? Wrong, give him some space and let him come to you with his problems, issues, or confessions of how much he loves you from time to time. 2) Have you been dying to tell him about what happened to you each day at work, home, or school? You may think you ar...

Another opportunity has come to discuss a problem in the relationship, you want to tell your lover how you feel, but you don't want the problem to go unresolved like last time. The last time was one of those times that ended with "You just love to argue, don't you?" It wasn't that you loved to argue, but how many times must you keep on having to bring up problems before your mate gets the point? What will you have to do to get through to them? The following tips will help you make your point whether loud and in their face or quiet and polite. First, try the "we are two reasonable adults" approach. Ask to speak with them a moment and let them know you will only be a minute. Tell them what is on your mind in the most polite way. The best way to describe your tone and demeanor would be like speaking with a sales clerk at your favorite store. "I just need for you to help me with something I have been trying to figure out. When would be a good time...

Too many times single women will go hunting with girlfriends in search of a potential mate only to come home heartbroken once again, because no one seemed to be right for them. There are many good reasons why that occurs, here's one main reason: don't look for a man with women! The following information in this article will provide you with all the things women do wrong to get a man and may answer the question why some of you are still single after 35. Some single women have either an extreme positive attitude or an extreme negative attitude. Where is the balance? No one wants Bubbles for a wife, maybe a lover, but not a wife. If everyone tells you how bubbly you are, it isn't always meant as a compliment. There are men who don't respond well to a woman who thinks that even a gloomy, rainy day with ice and snow is just "great!" Know how to tone your voice and body movements down a notch. No one is asking you to kill who you are, but you will have to consider m...

When a woman first meets a man she doesn't know his upbringing, the company he keeps, what he likes to do in his spare time and most of all whether he has a disease or not. She can only make a determination of the man's character initially by how he looks, his mannerisms, what he says and how he treats her and the people around them. As she becomes increasingly more interested in him, she begins to trust him and will gradually let her "guard down". She will buy him gifts, offer to help him with cooking and housework, impress his family and friends and take part in his interests. While she is growing a fondness for him, he may be ready to have a relationship with her, but struggle with a dark past in the process. What is in this man's dark past that the woman is not aware? For some men, it is a pattern of abusive behaviors toward women. It may have started when he witnessed his mother being beat by his dad, a live-in boyfriend or someone else. There may have been a...