When You Know You Are Headed for Breakup...

Living together or living apart?  You aren't ready to pack just yet those things you left over his or her house or those things you brought with you when you moved in together.  You also aren't ready to announce to the world you are single despite fantasizing about it often.  But what you are ready for is that slow mental break up.

Some of you know what I am talking about because you are in it right now.  You have sounded the alarm enough times through all those, "Let's talk" conversations.  You said things like, "I hope that we can do XYZ to improve the relationship."  Chances are you didn't really mean it.  You may have also said, "We really ought to make some changes here and there."  So you put some effort, but not much.  Then you threw in, "I sincerely do have feelings for you..."  But, you know this person is not your "one" anymore.

Maybe your partner was listening during your feel-good speeches, but obviously not close enough because it is still business as usual with this person.  He or she is still doing those things you asked him or her not to do.  The minor irritations are now pains.  Lately, your mind has been headed toward that place we call, "Break up."

So what is mental break up like these days despite still being in a physical relationship?  Well for starters, you know you aren't in love.  You rather not ever make love to this person again.  The excuses to avoid being intimate come more frequently.  You also find that just looking at him or her can be too much.  Your eyes begin to wander and you feel like anyone would be better than the person you are with now.  You get along enough with him or her to get some things accomplished around your living quarters, but that's about it.  You might even make a couple's appearance here and there, just to throw people off.  But a future together?  Well these days, that is out of the question!

Your best conversations with this person is when you are talking about important things because you have to, not because you really care much about conversing with him or her.  What really concerns you is no longer any of his or her business.  You save those conversations for family and friends.  Whether your soon-to-be ex knows it or not, your mind has checked out.  You are officially broken up.  Now all you have to do is get your feet to agree.

Bad Women to Avoid

As much as we would like to forget the past, most of us women were bad girls before we became "good" women (which the term is "good" is being stated loosely, because we are all works in progress).

If you are a single man whether spiritual or not, you may want to read this article just to get a refresher on what kind of woman you really ought to stay away from.

Bad Women to Avoid

Negative Chatter about Your Mate in Front of Others? It Might Cost You Your Relationship

Keep talking negative about your partner behind is or her back long enough and then in time, how you really feel starts to show.  Some couples don' know how to behave in front of others when their partners are around.  They start teasing, making disrespectful comments, and pretending as if everything is a joke.  Those of us, who are discerning, can see through the front, the person making the hurtful comments about his or her partner is obviously not happy in the relationship and his or her partner trying to brush off the negativity is being nice for a time, but just wait until we leave from here!

We can avoid a lot of disputes if we just learned how to be on our best behavior with our partners.  The tongue is nothing more than a big problem for many of us.  It blesses and curses.  It yells and it pleasures.  It provides peace, but it also starts wars.  With all the highs and lows, it's any wonder any of us can keep a relationship.

Check out my poetry on intimate relationship challenges here.