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Showing posts from November, 2008

Love Revisited: Helpful Do’s & Don’ts For The Widow/Widower Embracing New Love

Is it possible to mourn the loss of a beloved spouse and, while still grieving, to not only meet someone special, but fall in love and begin to build a new relationship that includes a commitment to sharing your lives? Can we overlap our loving and our grieving? The answer is a profound: YES! But, to smooth the path, keep these helpful Do’s and Don’ts in mind:

• Do allow yourself the joy of healing and moving on.

• Do allow yourself to feel good when this happens.

• Don’t feel guilty. You have been respectful, loving and caring towards your late spouse. Time has passed. It is healthy to want your life to move forward. Try to recognize your emotions every step of the way and not shy away from inner scrutiny, or back off from facing your emotions.

• Do know that it is possible to combine families with adult children no longer living at home.

• Do know that it will not always be smooth sailing; there will be moments of arguments and disagreements to work through.

Commonly, jealousy, fear, aban…

Relationship Tune Up - 7 Key Points to Avoid a Break Up or Break Down

"Every three months or 3,000 miles."

That's how the sticker in the left upper corner of my windshield reads.

It's a matter of common knowledge that we are supposed to maintain, service, and tune up our cars if we want them to run well and last.

In my experience, it rarely occurs to us to do the same thing with our love relationships.

More and more of the couples I see are not in need of long term therapy, they are more in need of a short term relationship tune up.

7 Key Points

What first attracted you to each other? - This is the first question I ask most couples because it helps to be reminded that your partner has some great qualities that led you to want to be in this relationship.

What are some of the strengths of your relationship? - Instead of all the things that are wrong with your relationship, what I want to know is what are some of the strengths of the relationship upon which we can build in order to solve the problems with which they are struggling.

When have you …

Men Wake Up! A Good Woman is Man's Best Friend

Yes dogs are loyal. They will stick by you to the very end. They will still love you even when you forget to feed them, stay away too long, yell at them, and so on. But dogs can't give you what you need when your spirit is reaching out for someone to complete you. Let's be real, dogs aren't a man's best friend, but a wise woman is. Notice the key word here is "wise." A foolish woman is a man's downfall. We see that all the time in the media. A political, entertainment, or sports figure decides to go out with a woman who has strategically placed herself at the right place at the right time to obtain one's material wealth. After attempting to destroy the man's reputation, she may find temporary fame and fortune (many women don't) and then when the lights are off she is by herself name-dropping to some friends.

Men overlook wise women all the time for the ditz. The reasons are endless from beauty to status, but whatever the reason, a wise woman wi…

Six Reasons Why You and Your Fiance Shouldn't Be Getting Married Right Now

Everyone around you has told you get married to your girlfriend, boyfriend or fiancé and you would like to, but you seem a bit apprehensive. There are obvious reasons why you are not ready and then there are some that aren't so obvious. The information contained in this article will help you uncover what has been bothering you about marrying your partner and why it is best to just put off your marriage plans.

One. The Ex

You are still involved with a previous mate. When you find yourself still doing the following: helping them whenever they need you, going out to eat with them, visiting them at their home, speaking to them intimately over the phone, emailing them about your personal life and inviting them to check out your Internet web pages and even worse still being married, you are not ready.

Two. Past Memories

You often think of the "good ole' days." Some people enjoy the memories of their single life, so much in fact, that it depresses them to think that one day…

Seven Things You Can Do Today to Become a Better Wife

Having problems in your relationship? Are you the one who is to blame for the majority of the issues that have recently surfaced in your marriage? Maybe it was a mood swing contributed to PMS or menopause or maybe you have been really stressed out lately. If so, then the following tips will help you make some quick improvements in your marriage, before your man starts thinking you are no longer interested in him.

1) Overcrowding your husband's personal space? If you have been breathing down his neck on a variety of issues and not seeing any results and he has told you to back off, why aren't you doing it? Then again, maybe you are so in love with him that you want to know his every move, of course he will understand, right? Wrong, give him some space and let him come to you with his problems, issues, or confessions of how much he loves you from time to time.

2) Have you been dying to tell him about what happened to you each day at work, home, or school? You may think you are d…

How to Deal with Your Lover Who Can't Handle Conflict

Another opportunity has come to discuss a problem in the relationship, you want to tell your lover how you feel, but you don't want the problem to go unresolved like last time.

The last time was one of those times that ended with "You just love to argue, don't you?" It wasn't that you loved to argue, but how many times must you keep on having to bring up problems before your mate gets the point?

What will you have to do to get through to them? The following tips will help you make your point whether loud and in their face or quiet and polite.

First, try the "we are two reasonable adults" approach. Ask to speak with them a moment and let them know you will only be a minute. Tell them what is on your mind in the most polite way. The best way to describe your tone and demeanor would be like speaking with a sales clerk at your favorite store. "I just need for you to help me with something I have been trying to figure out. When would be a good time for …

How To Find A Husband The Wrong Way

Too many times single women will go hunting with girlfriends in search of a potential mate only to come home heartbroken once again, because no one seemed to be right for them. There are many good reasons why that occurs, here's one main reason: don't look for a man with women! The following information in this article will provide you with all the things women do wrong to get a man and may answer the question why some of you are still single after 35.

Some single women have either an extreme positive attitude or an extreme negative attitude. Where is the balance? No one wants Bubbles for a wife, maybe a lover, but not a wife. If everyone tells you how bubbly you are, it isn't always meant as a compliment. There are men who don't respond well to a woman who thinks that even a gloomy, rainy day with ice and snow is just "great!" Know how to tone your voice and body movements down a notch. No one is asking you to kill who you are, but you will have to consider m…