Dating Advice, Relationship Problems

 So here I was looking around the room this past holiday season, my relatives were either busy watching TV, gaming in another room, or eating.  I recalled a book I had checked out earlier sitting on my desk, "You're Pulling My Leg" by Allen Wolf.  "The Ultimate Storytelling Game."   When I first received it, I thought,"I'm going to need this book just in case that awkward silence shows up and we all have nothing more to say."  Well, the time had come, yep, we had little more to say after exchanging pleasantries.  I asked one of my sons, "Would you like to look at a book I have?  I think it might be something you might find interesting." My eldest son is single.  He is tall, tan, lean and handsome, but he works a lot, and as he put it, "I don't have time for dating."  However, he has expressed interest in women.  I wondered what kind of conversation does he have with these ladies he encounters?  So he took a look at Wolf'

So many women fall into the "open and honest" trap that some manipulative men use to get them to share secrets, future plans, and more.  Meanwhile, they are not nearly as transparent as their lovers/friends/partners.  Some things will never be said because a man, with a plan, is not the least bit interested in spilling his guts. What would make some women feel like they needed to tell so much about themselves to someone from the start of a relationship?  For some ladies, they have such a strong desire to connect with dates while hopefully knocking out the possible competition.  They believe the more they share with their dates, the closer they are to them.  Others are naturally open and honest and think that because they are that way, the men they meet will be the same. The open door policy, secret spilling, and confessions work great when you know the individual you are with has learned many painful lessons in life and no longer want to lie, cover up, or keep his or her

Keep talking negative about your partner behind is or her back long enough and then in time, how you really feel starts to show.  Some couples don' know how to behave in front of others when their partners are around.  They start teasing, making disrespectful comments, and pretending as if everything is a joke.  Those of us, who are discerning, can see through the front, the person making the hurtful comments about his or her partner is obviously not happy in the relationship and his or her partner trying to brush off the negativity is being nice for a time, but just wait until we leave from here! We can avoid a lot of disputes if we just learned how to be on our best behavior with our partners.  The tongue is nothing more than a big problem for many of us.  It blesses and curses.  It yells and it pleasures.  It provides peace, but it also starts wars.  With all the highs and lows, it's any wonder any of us can keep a relationship. Check out my poetry on intimate relationsh

He didn’t want to tell her the truth for fear she might not want to be in his life anymore. She didn’t want to tell him the truth for fear he might tell someone in his family about her secret. People seem to reason that not telling something that has happened to them or that they witnessed is the only right way and it’s just better that no one finds out. The problem is people do find out! Whether it is through a casual conversation or a little detective work, someone seems to either find out or come real close to finding out. Why should we be open with those closest to us with our secrets? Why not keep them in the dark? We don’t want to be ridiculed, abused, or beat over the head with what we finally confess? Of course not, that is why we don’t tell, cover up, or blatantly lie. However, when we do too much of this it begins to affect what could have been a happy relationship, what could have been a long term career opportunity, and what could have been a blessing in disguise. We nee

For the majority of couples, a new marriage starts off fairly smoothly. Sure, there are some hiccups here and there, but for the most part things are good. The couple finds pleasure in doing the simple things together, like setting up a household, spending time together, and maybe even making plans for having kids of their own one day. In almost every marriage, there will naturally come times when things do not go quite so smoothly. These rough patches may start after a few months or a few years, but they will most likely start at some point for every married couple. This is just part of married life. In the healthiest of marriages, the couple learns to find ways to work things out between themselves. Even a good argument now and then is a sign that things are going well. It is a sign of health when a couple can discuss, debate and even argue once in a while as a way to settle their differences. In fact, it is precisely when a couple fails to communicate that the problems really get se

One of the most important aspects of a successful relationship is effective communication between both parties. Lack of communication in a relationship can result in hasty decisions that can even lead to separation. We need to understand the reasons behind communication breakdown and how they can be avoided to ensure a fulfilling relationship. Sometimes stress of work makes a person withdrawn, reserved and easily irritated. They don't like to discuss anything with their partners. Financial problems can also be the cause of communication breakdown between two people. When they try to resolve issues, their arguments result in more problems and eventually they stop discussing things. Many couples start hiding their personal problems from each other. They are afraid that if they opened up they will irritate their partner even more and therefore they choose to keep quiet. Remember that lack of communication is the first step towards a failed marriage. Sometimes mistrust

Relationship communication problems are very common. There are a number of ways we can look at what these basic relationship problems are all about. One of the first things to say is it seems men are primarily responsible for the issues associated with marital and relationship problems to do with communication. I imagine a lot of men reading the last sentence would become very defensive about that statement and think it is another example of male bashing. On the other hand there is every chance many women reading it would identify with what is said and wholeheartedly agree with the statement. Adele Horin, a columnist in the Sydney Morning Herald, writes about relationship communication problems. She says there is a "..shortage of men that women can relate to. The crisis in male-female conversation cries out for more attention. Relationships are being destroyed, or aborted at first date..." She goes on "Say a woman has found a man... Before long she has detected the fatal