Dating Advice, Relationship Problems

Marriage is more than a long term relationship. And counseling for engaged couples is one of the places you first learn that. As long as you take responsibility for the effectiveness of the counseling, you may never find yourself ending this long term relationship called marriage. You can make pre-marital counseling more than something you check off your to do list, turning it into a rite of passage that helps you enter your new adult world of being married. And if this is your second or third time around the wedding vows, you can use pre-marital counseling to make this one last a lifetime! In this day and age where so many couples have been together for years prior to the wedding day, here are some reasons to take counseling for engaged couples as seriously as you would if you had already been married for years and were going through a significant life change. People do not only seek out counselors with the words, "I need help with my relationship!" Some seek

Marriage. A new life together, Just the two of us? Well so we thought. Too often the meddling in-laws start sticking their nose in or one of the spouses runs home to Mummy and Daddy at the first hint of trouble in the marriage. Why do you think there are so many In-law jokes, actually there is no relationship that has more jokes attributed to it. These jokes can defiantly be funny, but in reality an in-law to close with no set boundaries is no joke at all and is the cause of all sorts of marriage problems. When we enter into marriage we have expectations on the various roles each of us will play eg: finances, children, around the home. These sometimes take a bit of ironing out as we go but with good communication a good partnership is formed. Teamwork. However, In-laws that are too close either emotionally or geographically can impose or push the boundaries too far on their amount of input regarding decisions to be made by the couple. Will they both work, have childr

The silent treatment, also known as the "cold shoulder treatment," consists of feigned apathy, total silence, and being distant on purpose. One person displays an attitude of complete disinterest for the spouse, as if the other person would be a complete stranger. This form of emotional abuse can be very disorienting. Being ignored on purpose by your husband, your most intimate ally, crumbles your whole being. The experience can leave you thinking that you have been reduced to the level of a ghost, if your presence is systematically ignored and turned irrelevant. Typically, the abuser does this as a form of non-physical punishment, with the purpose of showing his anger by making you feel less worthy, not valued, unimportant, and not cared about. Is a very strong negative message delivered in a way that doesn't leave external traces: there are no signal of physical abuse. Between the lines, what your abuser is trying to do is to manipulate you in the area

When a husband or wife discovers that their spouse has cheated on them, they have two choices: they can end the marriage or they can try to forgive their spouse and rebuild their relationship in an effort to save the marriage. Forgiving a cheater is an often difficult decision, that takes a valiant effort on the part of both the person who was cheated on and the person who cheated. Forgiving someone who you love who has hurt you in this way may well require more effort than anything you have ever done before. The forgiveness process will take time and there will be lots of sadness, anger and confusion to wade through. It's important to know that forgiveness does not mean you are condoning the actions of your spouse. It also does not mean that you will forget what has happened. What forgiveness does mean is that you want to move past the cheating and toward the future. The only way your marriage can recover from this damaging event is through the act of forgiveness. I

When you and your partner make the decision that you are ready to start your family it can be a very exciting time in your life. First of all, you get to use baby-making as an excuse to rekindle some romance that may have slipped away with the daily routines of your lives. Second, the anticipation of a little one running around, while a bit scary, is invigorating. Finally, you're ready to join the mommy club. You and your partner try month after month with no success. You're not worried yet because it has only been a few months. More than six months pass and you still are not pregnant. You start to become a little flustered. What do you do now? If you are under the age of 35, most doctors will tell you to try another six months before you consider alternative methods. Instead of just "trying" for twelve months, which can seem like forever when you want to conceive, I recommend talking with your doctor about some inexpensive initial fertility testing to

Has this ever happened to you? You believe you've found the girl of your dreams. She's beautiful, intelligent and you both gel together remarkably well. You've introduced her to your family and friends and they like her. She's introduced you to her family and friends and they like you too. Simply put, she's the ONE. You treat her like a pure diamond rock found in the mountains of Sierra Leone. It's apparent to everyone that you really care for her. Then all of a sudden things begin to change. She no longer seems excited to go out on dates with you. While you used to have rich and fun hour long conversations with her in the past, you now struggle to keep her attention for 5 minutes. Then it finally happens. She calls you up and says she doesn't love you and she's started seeing someone else. What happened, you ask. I thought she was meant to be the one. Many guys have been in the same boat as you and have asked the same question. The

Building trust in a new relationship is like building a fortress one block at a time. It may become deep and impenetrable or it may become sloppy with tiny holes. It all depends on how much effort you put into it and how solid you make the foundation. You of course want a solid foundation with no holes because it can be hard to fill those holes in later. Those holes, or suspicious moments, hang around in the back of people minds and get referred to when another 'hole' appears. The more holes you have the less stable your relationship is and the harder it becomes to make it solid. Here are a few things to remember when building your fortress of trust. Be the real you at all times - If you are acting a certain way trying to please your partner you have to know that one day you will feel comfortable enough to be your real self. When that day comes your partner will wonder where the other real you, who was really the fake you, went. This is not just a hole but a h

When you are in love, you may say and do things that later you might regret. You may tell a special someone you love them; meanwhile, there is someone else you have recently met you feel you just can't live without. So how do you know when is the right time to commit to a woman? The simple answer is when you have that gut feeling, little voice, or realize this is someone you would regret ever letting go. However, for the man who has already realized that his girlfriend is "the one," but isn't quite ready for marriage, there is always the promise ring. One. Think about her style. When choosing a promise ring, keep in mind the kind of jewelry you typically see her wear. Does she like big, showy items such as large hoop earrings, large stones in her rings, and big face watches? If so, then you want a very interesting ring with various cuts and most of all sparkles. However, if she is the conservative type but has a favorite color, then get her som

When you both started going out things were great! Of course, they were, she never said a single word to hurt you and you never did anything to make her feel bad -- you were both still getting to know one another! But one day or many days of fighting changed all that! At first you said nothing and excused her emotions as her just having a bad day, but her mood swings became more frequent. Meanwhile, she accuses you of changing too. "You just aren't that great guy anymore either. What happened?" she says. You are thinking, "How did this beautiful woman go from saying 'Please, thank you, I can't live without you'" to "I hate you! I wish I never met you! Just get me what I ask for!" You will need to start brainstorming if you haven't received a clear answer from her on what you could be doing to drive her crazy. She may have already told you, but she was talking so fast, crying, screaming and doing other things that you simply forg

Don't get in trouble with someone you are trying to make a good impression, read this before you say it with flowers! When Is it Not a Good Time to Say It With Flowers?

If you are sure you want to breakup with your boyfriend then there are a few things that you need to do in order to make it easier on you and less painful on him. Many guys will think they need to keep trying to win you back after you have broken up with them and they don't fully understand the reason that you broke up with them in the first place, but you do, and you have to remember those reasons no matter what they say or do, unless of course they can rectify them. So with that in mind you will also know that giving them any sense of false hope is not only teasing them it is making them try harder to win you back which you ultimately don't want. First when you breakup with them give them clear reasons why you are doing so. Tell them the truth. Whether it's that they don't understand you or you feel they don't treat you right, tell them. They may not get it, otherwise they would have been treating you good all along, but at least you've said it

Over the past few months, I've endured the hardship of breaking up with various partners, inspiring me to write this newsletter. The break up was the part of the whole sharking process that I really hated; sometimes even scaring me away from entering into relationships in the first place. It was always extremely uncomfortable as I was sensitive to the woman's reaction. However, if there wasn't any real, lasting connection or love, then I had to break up so as to not waste the time of the respective girl. It was definitely easier for me and the girl to end things earlier rather than later. Many recommend giving the woman respect, thereby meeting her and breaking up with her face-to-face.... I disagree! I think it's much harder for them, if you tell them face-to-face and extremely awkward and uncomfortable for both parties. At the most, I would meet after there had been a short period of respite, waiting for the initial emotional hit to settle, subsequent

The phone call that Justine just received feels like the equivalent of a tornado. The words that a woman from her book club just said to her have shaken her-- both inside and out. The woman said, "I saw your husband with another woman. He is having an affair." Justine can't believe that her husband-- who appears so trustworthy and loyal-- has been caught cheating. There are a multitude of ways that you might catch your man cheating, if that's what's going on. You might overhear him talking to someone on the phone. You may read an e-mail exchange. You could put together many of his out-of-character behaviors. And you might walk into your home, his workplace or somewhere else and literally catch him cheating. Assess the reliable facts. With a few stark exceptions, what you might be hearing or seeing could mean something completely different than what you assume it to mean. This can go either way. It's vital that you learn how to assess the RELIA

You may have read an article online, a blog post elsewhere and even subscribed to someone's Twitter account for advice on your marriage. You may still be coping with feelings of frustration, bitterness and even anger as it relates to the marital advice you have received from others. Some people just don't know how to provide some practical advice that you can put into practice today! If you are looking for a book that provides detailed insight as to what you need to do to save your marriage, Click Here!

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You have a great relationship with your man normally, but sometimes he doesn't call you or come around during the day. Meanwhile, you are busily going about your day until someone says or does something to trigger a negative thought in you about your man, you think, "I wonder if he hates me...what if he still has feelings for his ex...he only bought me that gift the other day because he has something to hide." Now where did those thoughts come from? Remember you have a great relationship with your guy? Can we say paranoia, insecurity, or maybe even a mild case of schizophrenia has begun to set in all because you are listening to others or making a mountain out of a mole hill because he doesn't always call or come around you? Why do we do this? Take something so nice and mess it up with ridiculous, negative thoughts? Most men just don't think like we do, and if they do, well you can put two and two together and he probably was around a lot more women than me

Crinkle in the middle of your forehead like an accordion. Dragging your feet, a sound like someone sweeping the floor. As you carry your half-broken heart from yesteryear's loves. Head turned to the left as you pass me by Careful not to look my way. Hoping I can't see what you are thinking. You don't like me. But if you closely look into my glaring eyes, you would see I don't like you. I am settling, standing on your empty promises. When I speak, you are annoyed as you take your seat. It's only a commercial. "What?" You say. "Nothing." I retort. I really don't like you! That's why I hold my nose as you sigh. Hoping I don't smell your breath. It's stale, old just like this relationship. Please don't exhale, keep that to yourself! It's not like anything will change! You will just stink up the atmosphere like you always do then find a way to blame me. What happened to the young guy I once knew anyway? He was full of life. Fre

We have all been guilty of it -- allowing so much time to pass staying indoors lovemaking that we forget how to date outside of the covers. In time, we grow bored with one another and wish that we would have taken it slow. Well if you feel like your relationship is headed in that direction, then do something, anything to keep it fresh especially if you aren't a mother or father yet! Once you both realized your pregnant, things change and don't let anyone tell you any different! Your time is not your own when the newborn shows up! All the sweet talking about how great a family would be is nice when there is no family to worry over. All the wonderful visions of a daughter with eyes like yours and a son with a grin like his are beautiful, but put that off for as long as you can! Spend a lot of time appreciating, learning, and spending time with one another. If more couples would have taken this kind of advice seriously, they wouldn't be openly or secretly resenting thei

Getting a date in this time and age can be a daunting task; lots of people seem to only want a one-night stand nowadays. If you're not one of those people, and are looking to go out with someone special, then there are a few things you can do in order to make your date successful. First off, make sure you are presentable. Nobody wants to go out with someone who hasn't showered or shaved for days. Take a look at your wardrobe as well. If your clothes scream "hobo at the train station begging for quarters", you might want to steer clear of them and find something else to wear. Although it might seem shallow, first impressions are very important on a first date, so choose your look wisely. It is usually customary for the man to pick up the woman when going on a date, because it shows that the man is responsible enough to own his own car. A man picking up his date on a bike isn't exactly a bad thing, but it can end up sending the wrong signals to his d

Dating to engagement should take minimum of one year because the real question is: how long does it takes to develop the type of friendship that leads to long-lasting marriage. That's crucially important because best marriages are based on being best friends and it takes 'time' to develop as best friends. How long that takes depends upon how well you and your prospective mate have mastered Communication Intimacy. That is communication at its deepest level. That's the goal of marriage-to work together in union as one team. This unity of heart, soul and spirit bonds couples as soul mates. A soul mate is someone who has the unique ability to bring out the best in us. The chemistry ignited between partners turns their souls on physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. The only way this can be accomplished is by "knowing" each other's inner workings that bond with ours in shared outlook and purpose. Does your prospective partner bring