How to Build Trust in a New Relationship
Building trust in a new relationship is like building a fortress one block at a time. It may become deep and impenetrable or it may become sloppy with tiny holes. It all depends on how much effort you put into it and how solid you make the foundation.
You of course want a solid foundation with no holes because it can be hard to fill those holes in later. Those holes, or suspicious moments, hang around in the back of people minds and get referred to when another 'hole' appears. The more holes you have the less stable your relationship is and the harder it becomes to make it solid.
Here are a few things to remember when building your fortress of trust.
Be the real you at all times - If you are acting a certain way trying to please your partner you have to know that one day you will feel comfortable enough to be your real self. When that day comes your partner will wonder where the other real you, who was really the fake you, went. This is not just a hole but a huge missing block.
New relationships should be about learning what each other's likes and dislikes are and how compatible you really are together. You need to be honest and truthful at all times about who you are, even if you think it may hurt your relationship. Chances are it won't and if it does then it is better sooner than later.
Remember that actions speak louder than words - You may say that you like their favourite restaurant but if you sigh and make faces the whole time you are there then your actions are showing otherwise. No matter how much you say you like it you will not be convincing if your actions do not show it.
This leaves the other person to guess at what you 'really' think about the restaurant and, worse, it leaves it to their imagination.
Always keep your actions in line with your words to avoid trust issues that get propelled by imagination.
Communicate about everything - Proper and effective communication is the single biggest thing you can do to build trust in your relationship. If you are open and honest about everything then why would your partner have any reason to distrust you?
Plus sharing your thoughts, beliefs, and feelings with someone creates a tighter and tighter bond the more you do it. The tighter bond you have equals the more trust you have.
New Relationships take some work but you can build a solid and amazing relationship if you put the effort into it.
Bellaisa is an advocate for happy and stable relationships with yourself and with others and she has put together a site that has tips, articles, and resources for every stage of relationships called The Relationship Circle.
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