Dating Advice, Relationship Problems

As long as two people live together with strong views about any and everything, there is nothing neither can do about arguing except try to listen and do what the other wants. Tempers will flare in any relationship and that is normal.  People will grow cold toward one another.  Some will act violently, while others will take a long walk.  Some people choose the silent treatment.  Although a dispute may start out okay doesn't necessarily mean it will end okay, so a person in a relationship must use wise judgment when defending his or her point of view. If you think you can be in a relationship with a strong-minded individual and not argue, forget it!  There are those who are strong minds that can be quiet and tune people out, but how long do you think they can get away with that?  Someone somewhere is catching hell because someone in a controlling relationship simply doesn't know how to vent in a healthy way that gets his or her partner to listen.  Meanwhile, the partner is

Sometimes you will dislike your partner, even wish you never met him or her.  But, you have to ask yourself, is there anyone who will love you more than this person does right now (besides God and parents of course.)  The answer is, "No."  You might say, but what about this...or what about that..?  Love takes time.  Are you patient enough and determined to make love work the second, third, fourth or even fifth time or more again with this one or someone different?  We might assume because someone else (that one who keeps looking at you at the workplace or the friendly girl down the street) who wishes to be a part of your life is Mr. Right or Ms. Right,  but don't be so sure.  Love isn't about who makes you tingle inside and makes you feel 10 years younger as I'm sure you have already learned the hard way.  Love is far more deeper than that!  We should think, that maybe just maybe, the reason why the person who is currently in your life sticks around is because

Looking at the sheer number of people who break up and vow to never go back to an old flame, it seems that there just isn't any hope for couples who desire to reconcile.  Could it be that many of these "break up to make up" type of relationships end up not lasting unto death, simply because people are too caught up with the warm, fuzzy feelings that come with getting back together? I decided to interview myself on this issue of reconciliation since I have been there and done that many times.  During my quiet meditation, I believe I had heard some of the wisest words in a long time from my Creator which many of you are already familiar.  I suggest you go to the Holy Bible and look up I Corinthians 13 and read about love.  He asked me to ask myself, "Can I be patient?  Can I be kind?   Can I no longer keep record of wrongs?"  How I felt about these questions and the way I answered them said a lot to me about reconciling with my past. You see, all it takes is a

When you find yourself wishing that you could improve upon your existing relationship, be careful because it is only a matter of time that you will start listing everything that is wrong with your mate.  Sometimes it is simply better to let your relationship just be.  So you had an argument the other day that was so bad that the cops should have been called.  Did anyone get physically abused?  If not, what you worried about?  Well, "he might hurt me in the future" or "she is crazy enough to punch my lights out."  Well if it is that serious, well you don't need me to tell you what you should be doing or maybe you should, visit: http:// laboringtoloveanabusivemate.blogspot.com if this describes you.  However, for those of you who just get really loud when you argue and look really crazy, let's talk about the relationship. If your mate is oftentimes bringing out the best in you, then why not stay?  And seriously what do you need to work on in your relations

If you have ended a relationship recently with someone, then you should know exactly what the title of this entry means, "Break Up Withdrawal."  Like a drug addict trying to sober up, a person who has recently broken up with someone is going to go through withdrawal.  There are the stomach, head and chest aches whenever you think of this person or hear his or her name.  You may also experience mood swings that make you angry one minute and sad the next.  There is usually a strong desire to be with him or her, but after a lengthy discussion one realizes that his or her decision to let go was best.  You will miss your ex and at times will go over in your head the events that led to your break up.  At times, you think he or she is the worst person in the world and may tell everyone so via phone, poetry, music, or counseling, but secretly you know he or she isn't that bad.  You might surprisingly think about an ex from long ago and want to reconnect, because you desire

I know it's hard right now for some couples in roller-coaster type relationships--up today and down tomorrow.  They are at their wits end with a partner who just isn't fulfilling a need, listening, showing affection, etc.  So your eyes start wandering, seeking couples out who appear to be in love.  You wish the nice-looking couple seated on the park bench, talking by the pool, or eating side-by-side at the restaurant were you and yours.  Well I got news for you... Don't be jealous!  Don't want what they have!   I tell you it's short-lived and most always isn't what it appears to be behind closed doors no matter what they tell you!  Some people love to create false fronts, so that those around them will say, "What a great couple!  I wish that were me and..."  These romantic couples believe that if they can create an image of "happy" and "in love" that it will help their relationship and in some cases it might.  However, for some re

In one’s quest to find Mr. Right or Ms. Right, he or she will find that there are more Mr. and Ms. Wrongs. So that you are saving yourself time and money, learn how to protect yourself from a potentially bad date. There are tips discussed that may also save your life. One. Take a self-defense course, watch an online video, or DVD about protecting yourself. You just never know a woman or man may act like a lady and gentleman at first, but spend a little time with them and they may do or say things that threaten you. Don’t get caught off guard. Learn maneuvers to restrain a woman who may be clawing or biting you. Find out how to fight a man who may be a lot bigger than you. Two. When making arrangements to meet, let your date know that you have some things to do after the date. He or she may want to change the appointment, don’t do it. This will be your excuse in case you don’t like his or her company. If you don’t want to come off as a liar, really do plan to

Good friends like good men are hard to come by and that is why some women will fight tooth and nail about their partners. They want to know that their partners will stick closer to them than they would their best friend. However, that is oftentimes not the case. Usually the friend outlasts all the relationships. You can’t help but think was the friend also responsible for some if not all the breakups? So how do you know that you are no longer your husband’s closest friend? Here’s how you can tell. You don’t occasionally set some time aside to learn more about his interests and hobbies. You do well listening to him when he tells you about things that matter like groceries, bills, doctor’s appointments, and children, but when he starts telling you about his game of golf, the workload at his job, or other things that you aren’t a least bit interested in, you zone out. If you remember, when you first dated him you managed to find a way to stay interested in what he had

Have you ever felt like your husband or partner just doesn’t seem to understand what his role in your life is supposed to be? You have explained to him many times how you feel about him and how you want him to be pro-active in your life, but even with the long speeches, the cries, and the anger outbursts, he still proceeds in the relationship as if he doesn’t care about you or the things that matter to you most like your family and friends. Every woman in this situation has a choice and the obvious one is you either put up with his nonchalant, insensitive attitude or you tell him goodbye. Why is it that some men behave in this way? The answer is quite simple they don’t understand women and aren’t interested in learning more about them either. A man who truly respects , admires, and most importantly loves his woman is going to do what it takes to make a relationship work. Sometimes he needs her to guide him to the self-improvement book, drive him to the relationship counselor, or walk

So she told him the other day that he wasn't affectionate enough.  He listened to her, then promised he would consider her feelings more and periodically kiss and hug her for no reason, but to say, "I love you."  Days turned into weeks then weeks turned into months and business continued as usual.  He gave her a list of complaints.  Things like what she was and wasn't doing while never following up with anything that showed he appreciated her actions much less her existence.  He debated about frivolous matters and often ignored her. One day he found out that he wasn't the only man in her life and that there wasn't just one, but many men in her life.  They all fulfilled a purpose, and for some strange reason, he wondered what role did he play.  The truth of the matter was right before his eyes, his role had been long revoked--he no longer played any role.  His woman had been mustering up the courage to tell him it was over weeks prior, but he found out befo

So you haven’t been in a relationship that long and you are already being accused of cheating when you know you haven’t. Chances are you are conducting yourself in a way that is making your partner feel insecure. What could you be doing to make him or her feel that way? Here are some tips. 1) Being extremely private. One can understand in the days of identity theft that you want to be extra careful password protecting your accounts, watching where you leave your cell phone, and locking up your private files, but when a situation comes up where you may need your partner’s assistance or need to share information between one another and you act overprotective with him or her about it, you are giving them a reason to suspect you are up to something whether you are or not. Some couples will share a password only temporarily and then as soon as their partner’s back is turned they change their password. This sends a message that “I don’t trust you. I have something to hide” even though yo

When you first met your partner you didn’t see him or her as being flawed. Rather, you have seen a human that fulfilled your needs at the moment. For some of you reading this, you had a need for a companion, financial issues to contend with, a bad relationship previously and other circumstances that gave you the motivation to want to start over again in a new relationship. Notice there is no mention of love. Because love usually is not the driving force in relationships that start off in this way. You most likely came to the realization already that love was never what you felt, but an excitement, lust, and just an overall feeling of temporal peace because you now have someone who will lay beside you at night and go to events with you periodically. This may have worked in the past, but now you know it is no good for you. You tried repeatedly to make things work and he or she gave you the cold shoulder, cursed you, or even worse cheated on you. You forgave them for their misdeeds, bu

Your woman has come to you over and over again with all sorts of issues from how to put things back to whether or not you love her and over, over, and over again you have given her explanations and tried to listen to her. You know she loves you, but maybe you don’t know whether you love her. There are reasons why women leave their men or cheat on them. One. She doesn’t think you are her friend. You say that you consider her not only as a lover but a friend too, but do you really? When serious issues in life have come up, have you included her or did you run to your family, friends or an ex for support? Friends care about one another. They include them in on the significant things that happen to them in their lives. When she upsets you, do you talk to her one-on-one or do you talk to everyone else but her? She has dealt with her share of backstabbing friends in the past, so the last thing she expected was her man going behind her back and bad mouthing her too.