Life after Dating, Relationship - What the Future Holds?

You might have made up in your mind this is the last relationship, last date, last friends with benefits arrangement, last marriage, or cheating you will do with someone.  But what happens when you are officially done with this connection?  What might replace the void left behind?

Sometimes people end up going back to unfulfilling connections once they are so-called over, because they never bothered to consider what might bring peace to them long after the thrill has gone with someone.  It isn't too soon to start thinking about the break up, your new life, and what the future holds for you.  When you are truly ready to make something your last, you either will stick with him or her or let that person go altogether.  Your mind is only going to get along or go along with someone before it screams one day, "Now why are we in this?  Don't I deserve better?"  "Better" doesn't come from another  human being it comes from within. 

If I want "better" anything I am going to make the kind of choices that will make me feel better and most likely I am going to think long term.  Short term connections just don't cut it.  Long term connections filled with drama don't better you either.  Being better and doing better comes from a mindset that no longer wants to settle for people, places, and things that don't aid us toward our goals to betterment personally and professionally.

Life after dating or a relationship is what you choose to make it!  What do you most want to accomplish?  Redirect your focus on that rather than an undesirable connection or a pessimistic person who is more down on most days than up.  What have you been telling others you really want to do?  Have you been doing anything to make personal dreams a reality?

Depending on who you connect yourself with will determine whether you will ever achieve your personal goals.  A person who knows how to move out the way and let you fly can be a great friend, but a poor marriage partner.  He or she might give up much for you, but become difficult if you don't return the favor.  A mate who is often disputing what you say or do and doesn't bother to connect you with on an emotional or physical level unless you initiate contact is a selfish person and a burden.  It isn't difficult to predict what a future might look like if you carry difficult, selfish, or mean-spirited people along your life journey.

If you can't see yourself doing what you are doing right now in less than five years, then it is okay to start disconnecting yourself from who or what might be negatively impacting you.  If all seems to be alright and you don't find the person you are with nothing more than an added benefit, then great.  However, do think about what you are contributing to the relationship that makes him or her feel good.  But if you are honest with yourself and you find that you take more than you give, it is safe to say this person might be thinking about a life in the near future without you.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of She's Crazy and Socially Sweet, Privately Cruel Abusive Men.

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