On Predicting the Future of Your Relationship

You can't say for sure what might happen to your relationship, but you can pay close attention to enough signs early on to determine whether it will survive and become a reasonably quality relationship or a dysfunctional one that might eventually come to an end.  Consider the following signs there are storms ahead.

1.  You or your partner is buying much of the stuff related to the relationship from the gas in the car to go out on a date to the rent for the place you both have sex in.

Most likely, you will also be the one paying for more things in the future like his or her child from a previous relationship, a family trip, bailing him or her out financial problems, or paying for medical bills.  Disagreements will occur about money.  If you or partner is in control of paying for most things, you might eventually act prideful and disrespectful about all of what you are doing for this person.

2.  Sex happens either too much or not enough and when you bring the topic up your partner is nonchalant about it.

The likelihood that someone will be tempted to cheat emotionally and/or physically is probable.

3.  A partner is either inconsistent with employment or works way too much.

He or she has issues with staying employed or works alot.  This will definitely cause problems when a mate is not addressing the problems while wanting you to be more understanding, patient, kind, etc.  You have a life too and when you agreed to be with this person you thought there was going to be some kind of benefits; instead you have a parent child kind of relationship or lack thereof.

4.  You know you will have problems and more problems in the future when he or she is often talking about disagreements one has had with others (family, co-workers, friends, etc.)

Sooner or later that tough exterior you might have (or your mate) will turn on you.  How much cursing, name-calling and yelling can you tolerate?

5.  He or she is not a kid and or pet-lover.

Whether you or your partner has children (plan on having them) or a pet, if this person is not interested in animals and kids or don't really love or like the ones they got, you most likely will have  issues that will affect your relationship if you should choose to have either or bring yours into the mix.

The problems previously mentioned and others can be dealt with by using healthy strategies to mediate and resolve conflicts.  However, if one or both parties are not in agreement, then the challenges will only increase over time leading to an unfortunate break up, or if not that, a long-term dissatisfying and troubled relationship.

Nicholl McGuire author of Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate and other books.



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