Dating Witchcraft Women, Seemingly Very Caring Women

Does Laid Back Really Mean a Future Lazy Partner?

When a date described himself as “laid back,” I should have known what he really meant was “lazy.”  We usually think of a person being laid back as someone who is not reactionary, chill, or cool.  However, what we don’t think about is if a person is too “cool,” they also don’t want to follow any rules too!  If a person is “laid back” or “chill,” they also don’t feel as if they have to cook, clean, organize, or take care of other responsibilities too!

Photo by Hamza Bounaim on Unsplash

Be careful what you ask for, because you just might get it!  Mr. or Ms. Laid Back is nice to be when conversing or visiting new places, but you don’t want “laid back” when you have a list of tasks that need to be completed within a set limit of time.  You don’t need “laid back” when you are in a rush.  Mr. or Ms. Laid Back wants to do most things on his or her terms and who cares about what others’ think? 

When you hear a date sound like he is bragging about how laid back he or she is, ask questions and be observant.  “So what do you mean when you say you are laid back?  Do you mind giving me some examples of when you acted laid back?”  Don’t interrupt or share your personal opinion about laid back people, just sit back and listen.  You just might find out early on that your date may not be compatible with you.  Most hard workers do not describe themselves as laid back.  People who are passionate about their hobbies, jobs, children, and more don’t usually describe themselves as laid back.  Therefore, listen for clues that your date isn’t hard working, passionate about people and things that you might be or appears to care less about most things.

For many “laid back” types, they really enjoy an environment that is free of demands, schedules, and excitement.  They enjoy more times in front of screens rather than out on an adventure.  They prefer text over phone.  They like things more than people especially if they require much from them. 

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate, Laboring to Love Myself and other books.

9 Signs a Date is Uncompassionate, Cold-Hearted

Cold and uncaring, when a date like this walks into a room, you feel something strange.  Initially you can’t explain it and may even brush it off, but the energy isn’t good.  This negative vibe you feel is coming from a cold-bloodied person.  They don’t always look like a Stephen King thriller with a hollow look in their eyes; sometimes they appear engaged, kind, and intelligent.  However, these people when angry are downright unfriendly, unprofessional, and unintelligent!  So before you find yourself planning a future with a psychopath or narcissist, know the signs he or she sooner or later will care less about you!

Photo by Karl Fredrickson on Unsplash

1)  They just seem far too interested in you at first.  They make you feel like they are too good too be true.

2)  They tell white lies and hope you will overlook.

3)  They don’t seem to respond to your stories genuinely.  It seems like they are forcing emotion especially when what you are sharing is upsetting.

4)  You feel like they are acting or pretending like they care to help you when you call upon them.  Yet, when they are working with you, they aren’t doing much or doing a lot but complaining.

5)  When you first started dating the person didn’t hesitate to find out how you are feeling or how was your day, but in time, that all changes.  The date doesn’t bother to ask anymore, “How do you feel, How are you, How was work, or Do you need anything?”

6)  When others experience a loss, your date doesn’t have much to say.  Once again, he or she appears to be concerned by faking emotion.  

7)  When your date forgets to return a friend’s item, damages or loses someone else’s belongings, he or she doesn’t bother to take responsibility without repeatedly being asked about it.

8)  He or she doesn’t care to discuss your feelings, you are considered emotional or like all the rest.

9)  When approached about one’s nonchalant behaviors, the date feels justified in behaving that way and doesn’t see why their unresponsive demeanor is a problem for you.  

When dating a person lacking empathy expect the following:  they will not care too much about what you are saying unless you create distance, they will not bother to resolve matters without you being firm with him or her about them, and they will not appreciate your honest feedback about what they said or did or will look for ways to make you feel miserable.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Too Much, Too Soon Internet Dating Blues and other books.

Too Good Too Be True Men and Women - dating

Too Much Too Soon - discerning the dating profile

7 Things a Spouse, Friend Does that Makes You Feel Unloved

Lately, you have been noticing your loved one is not acting very loving.  This person is not being kind to you, isn’t acting very generous, and doesn’t seem like he or she wants to be in your presence.  Thoughts of separating from this person have been increasing lately.  What more might you need to know to determine whether the relationship or friendship has run its course.

One.  The individual doesn’t call or bother to text any niceties when he is away from you.

If this was something that he or she once did, ask him or her why has it stopped?  Are you continuing to do these things or have you also changed?

Two.  He or she doesn’t ask any questions that would encourage you to express your thoughts or feelings including inquiries about your work day.

Whether this person has become uncaring or always was, ask yourself, “What might be going on in his or her life that would make this person stop communicating with you?  What might you have said or did that may have contributed to his or her quiet behavior?”

Three.  A mate doesn’t compliment you when you look beautiful/handsome and this person says nothing when you look ill.

Has there been a history of disputes that have included: name-calling, negative statements related to appearance, and other things that are simply mean?  If so, then he or she might feel it is better to say nothing then say something to hurt your feelings yet again.  On the other hand, he or she might be too busy to notice.  This sort of behavior rarely means that he or she doesn’t like or love you anymore.

Four.  Your partner/friend doesn’t uplift you with kind words or physical touch when you feel down.

Now the lack of kindness and touch is a cause for concern.  No rub on the back from a friend who sees you cry or a kiss from a lover?  There is something clearly wrong with this unaffectionate person who may have once been very willing to comfort you.  Most often people pull away from one another due to unresolved past issues.   When you are still angry with someone, you or that person doesn’t want to be nice or touch.  It’s like a child, who just got spanked by his or her parent the little person doesn’t genuinely want to hug mom or dad afterward.  When a spouse has dishonored the relationship by being emotionally involved with another or is physically cheating, this person is going to be less affectionate.  If you have become someone’s least favorite person, they will avoid doing things like:  making eye contact, shaking your hand or patting you on the back.

Five.  Your mate acts friendlier with others than he or she does with you.

When you observe your partner being really nice with everyone else and acting unemotional, angry or even irritated with you, there is obviously something wrong.  You will need to do what you can to find out who or what might be causing his or her disinterest in you.  Be open to hearing feedback from your partner or friend about yourself. 

Six.  The individual puts on an act in front of people pretending that he or she cares for you.

This is a sign that he or she seriously doesn’t care about you but is more concerned about how he or she looks to others when this person is with you.  Cut your losses early and begin to plan to distance yourself from your so-called partner or best friend, because his or her behavior will only worsen the longer you stick around.

Seven.  When you are experiencing challenging times your mate rarely offers his or her assistance.

This is a clear sign that the relationship has reached a point where the likelihood that it is going to survive is not good.  This person has made a point to cut off personal feelings for you by no longer caring about who you are and what you do even at your worse.

Relationships and friendships are built on qualities like:  trust, appreciation, support, and love. Yet, when you no longer feel these basic emotions from someone who claims to care for you, it is safe to say that he or she is pretending until the right time comes to break up.

Nicholl McGuire

Relationships, Friendships will Change

Why Your Ex Doesn't Want You Back

He has his issues with his ex-girlfriend.  She doesn't feel she can trust her boyfriend.  The more people keep inside the worse things can get.  This is why many relationships come to a swift end.  Your ex may not want you back for any number of reasons.  An important thing you should know is that if you should force something that isn't meant to be, sooner or later you will reap the consequences.

1.  An ex may have someone else that is showing him or her interest.

The two might not be dating, but whatever the chemistry, an ex is curious.  How can one emotionally compete?  Sometimes history together has little to do with those growing feelings inside that tell a former partner, "Why not explore new possibilities, he or she hasn't hurt you?"

2.  The influence of the ex's family and friends has a significant impact.

When an ex's ears are tuned into family there is little one can do.  His or her loved ones most likely warned the ex from the start of the relationship it won't work.  With enough pressure, an ex will not think about jeopardizing his or her relationship with relatives, especially those who give her or him much.

3.  You blew it when you wouldn't admit your wrongdoing.

Sometimes pride gets in the way and after awhile a partner gives up on seeking truth.  So if you aren't transparent and you continue to lie, deny, minimize, and blame every time a certain subject matter comes up, your former mate will shut down.

4.  You have someone else.

As strange as this may seem, but sometimes we chase after the one that got away because there is something with a new partner that just doesn't satisfy us.  Even though we know an ex isn't good for us and neither is the one we are dating, yet we let our minds and hearts at times direct us where we shouldn't be.  The ex picks up that your feelings are elsewhere, he or she isn't coming back.

5.  Your ex has simply moved on.

No explanation or analysis needed on why your ex doesn't want you anymore.  There isn't anyone else, he or she isn't the least bit concerned about what loved ones think, and couldn't care less about the time you two were together.  This person just wants to get on with life without you.

When you take a moment to think about things, you will feel that maybe you aren't in love or like as much as you think with an ex.  You may be lonely, in need of material wealth or money, feel like a failure, or whatever else that has little to do with winning an ex back, but has everything to do with getting personal desires met.  An ex might have seen negative things about you that you have yet to discover about yourself and if this is the case, why bother wondering anymore why he or she doesn't want you back, work on you!

Nicholl McGuire is an author and inspirational speaker.  She is also the blog owner.