When a Woman Cheats

Cheating on anyone or anything is wrong. Most of us learned very young that to go behind a friend’s back and wrong that person might cause a fight or worse one might lose a potential friend. But just because people know things, doesn’t mean that they will always adhere to a certain code of honor. Such is the case with a woman scorned. One who is unwilling to compromise any further in a miserable relationship will be tempted to cheat. However, before some cheating partners make their exit (or get booted), they have to go out with a bang of sorts usually finding someone they feel more compatible with, possibly better looking than their current mate, while still receiving sex, money, and other things from their present partner. Some things women do that lead up to cheating could have been prevented had their mates picked up on the signs.

1. She often thinks and communicates her concerns about the relationship.

A woman who is on that path toward cheating on her man is going to talk to him, relatives, and friends about what bothers her. If her intimate partner is too busy, emotionally wounded or has other issues, and doesn’t recognize or acknowledge his negative contribution to their relationship woes, then she is going to start contemplating whether the grass is indeed greener on the other side.

One of the worse things a man who still loves his partner can do is to start taking back every nice thing he has ever said or done especially during an angry fit. A woman who reasons that “cheating is okay because he is probably doing it too” will replay every wrong thing her man has ever done to validate her accusation even if it proves to be untrue. Those that usually have some idea that something is going on with the woman and doesn’t see her mate in a good light usually will withdraw or ignore her man because they don’t want to get involved in her relationship dramas. Some will enable the woman because they too are in unhappy relationships. When the woman attempts to discuss her woes with her mate, typically a man busy with work and other responsibilities, cheating, or doing other things that cause him to pay less attention to his partner will not view her needs as important. Therefore, he misses the clues that his mate his thinking about stepping out on him.

2. She becomes more particular about her appearance.

When a man doesn’t bother to express his appreciation for his woman and overlooks the things she does to improve self, she will feel slighted. As a result, she will have just one more reason to want to cheat on him.

If the way she looks wasn’t important in the past, it most likely will be when a new man comes into her life. Now one can’t assume that a woman alters her appearance for a man if there is no proof. But if her partner isn’t complimenting her and others are, watch how she reacts and pay close attention to a certain man’s name that keeps popping up in conversation.

3. She is no longer interested in spending as much time with partner and family.

When opportunities come to vacation with family, visit with relatives, and others, she is often declining invites, not staying home, but out and about. Her mate has no idea where she might be. She is often texting, emailing, or calling someone out of view. A partner might notice that his cheating mate is often bored, argumentative or short with the family and leaves the family home without saying much.


4. She finds the time to do the things she wants while often forgetting or ignoring the needs of her family.

How many times is she going to forget picking up the children from grandma’s house? When does she plan on sitting down and talking with her mate or even having sex with him? Why is she talking so much about her male friend/co-worker and can remember what he likes and what time he needs for her to be somewhere? Why is she always late coming home? When you put everything together, don’t just pick out one or two things to ponder, consider patterns.

5. If she is spiritual, she begins to stray away from God and things related to Him.

Pray for your partner if you have a faith. It is obvious that she is no longer respecting the Holy teachings, and isn’t interested in spiritual things like she did at one time when she use to go to church but stopped going. Sometimes cheaters will go to church more and stay home less. Could it be guilt or is the one she is cheating with at the church? This is why husbands should be going to churches and other spiritual events with their partners. The temptation can be greater in the House of God then anywhere else!

6. She often finds fault with her man.

From how he looks to what he says, it appears that every time her partner says or does something she becomes visibly irritated with him. Sometimes she complains to others about him in such a way that it sounds like she is ready to leave him. She may not have found someone yet or slept with a love interest, but she is preparing herself for the future.

7. She may realize that her lover(s) are not what she really wants and proceeds to stop seeing or talking to them.

When all else fails, she might stop going out with them, conversing over the phone or Internet with them, and doing other things. But most women once they start cheating, need some good reasons to want to stay in a relationship that is unsatisfying, most likely someone or something has changed for her to want to continue being with her partner.

A disgruntled wife or girlfriend who has repeatedly shared her concerns with her partner about things that are bothering her, will look the other way. Some women will cheat with minds and eventually bodies, while others might play with the idea of being with anyone but with their current mate. Women are similar to men when they aren’t happy at home, they will be tempted to go elsewhere.


Nicholl McGuire author of When Mothers Cry


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