Before You Can Fix Your Unhappy Relationship - The Top 6 Don't Do List
Many people think that the way to winning their spouse or lover back is to show him/her how much it means to them to get back together as soon as possible. They call and leave desperate messages, email one message after another, text like there is no tomorrow, and generally bombard the ex with messages of all kinds to "call back", "I'm sorry", "we need to talk" and "I need to see you now".
This just doesn't work. In fact, it may blow your chances totally of EVER getting back with your spouse or lover.
S/he will feel much more alienated and possibly angry with you for doing this.
Your emotions are all over the place right after a break up and you are likely to say and do things that you "think" you need to do, but, in reality, you are just pushing that other person away even faster.
Here is a list of "Don'ts" when you are trying to get your ex back:
1. Don't lie! If you say something that isn't true and they find out about it, how are they supposed to trust you?
2. Don't say something just to push their buttons! Their reaction to your pushing will probably be the opposite of what you really want to hear.
3. Don't say unkind things to make your ex feel guilty or bad, again, it will just push them away because you are trying to make them feel uncomfortable. Stay away from negative words and feelings.
4. Don't try to make your spouse or lover feel jealous! This will also backfire on you and you will end up feeling much worse than you did before.
5. Don't turn into a stalker! Not only is this very negative to your relationship, it's also illegal!
6. Don't go looking for revenge or "getting back" at your ex. Again, this is negative no matter how you look at it and, if you really care about your ex, how does hurting them make you feel better?
Nothing on this list is positive and none of them are good strategies to implement in the hopes of getting your spouse or lover back.
In this article, I've given you the Top 6 Things NOT to do if you want to get back with your ex. If you want the "You Want To Do List" go to Fix Marriage lens and get that information.
You may find the same information at http://squidoo.com/fixmarriage1
By Michelle Lacroix Toro