Six Reasons Why You and Your Fiance Shouldn't Be Getting Married Right Now
Everyone around you has told you get married to your girlfriend, boyfriend or fiancé and you would like to, but you seem a bit apprehensive. There are obvious reasons why you are not ready and then there are some that aren't so obvious. The information contained in this article will help you uncover what has been bothering you about marrying your partner and why it is best to just put off your marriage plans.
One. The Ex
You are still involved with a previous mate. When you find yourself still doing the following: helping them whenever they need you, going out to eat with them, visiting them at their home, speaking to them intimately over the phone, emailing them about your personal life and inviting them to check out your Internet web pages and even worse still being married, you are not ready.
Two. Past Memories
You often think of the "good ole' days." Some people enjoy the memories of their single life, so much in fact, that it depresses them to think that one day they will be married. Others can't get over reminiscing about the ex and reflecting on how things would have turned out had they done certain things in the relationship or had the ex did some things differently for them.
Three. Your Partner's Family
You don't get along with anyone on your mate's side of the family. They invite you to family events and you never want to attend for a variety of reasons. There are more than a select few in your partner's family who are critical of you to your face and behind your back. When you tell your mate about their behavior, he or she doesn't do anything about it.
When you and your partner make plans to do something together, he or she has to always include someone from his or her family. Your mate's family often call or drop by at strange hours of the night. When you tell your partner how this makes you feel, he or she defends their actions and argues with you about it.
Whenever your partner's family is in trouble he or she is always bailing them out. When you tell your partner how this makes you feel and how this affects items being bought for your own home, he or she finds excuses for why they feel what they did is the "right thing to do or "don't worry over it we will be blessed."
Four. Employment
You or your partner can't maintain a steady job. In addition, you may not be happy with your career and education. Without being at peace with those issues, you may not be satisfied with the money you make either. There are some people who can't seem to make up their mind where they would like to work and have a problem committing to any job.
Five. Children
You don't want a family, but your partner is open to the possibility. When your partner brings up this subject you may be the one who becomes emotional about it. Then again, he or she might be. If so, you definitely don't want to commit to them for the rest of your life if the two of you can't agree on this subject. If you know you can't afford it right now, don't get married to someone who thinks that you can at this time. Most of all, if you or your partner has unresolved issues with how your parents treated you, put off having children until you are at peace with your past.
Six. Bad Habits
You have bad habits you can't seem to quit. Partners who stay out all night and come home whenever they feel like it will not all of a sudden just stop their inconsiderate behavior just because you got married. If you or your partner makes plans to enjoy life without the other on a regular basis, why bother getting married?
Continuing to smoke, drink or do drugs when your partner has asked you to quit is definitely a sign you need to put off marriage.
Spending money you know you don't have on things you can't afford will cause future arguments, so don't get married until you have a budget that you can follow on a consistent basis.
You can prevent a future divorce if you don't ignore the signs that you see in the present. Marriage is just as so many have described, "Work." It can be enjoyable work or just a job, it's up to you to decide which you will choose. Build a foundation now that will last a lifetime for you and your partner by doing what you can to better yourself, before you get married!
Nicholl McGuire
One. The Ex
You are still involved with a previous mate. When you find yourself still doing the following: helping them whenever they need you, going out to eat with them, visiting them at their home, speaking to them intimately over the phone, emailing them about your personal life and inviting them to check out your Internet web pages and even worse still being married, you are not ready.
Two. Past Memories
You often think of the "good ole' days." Some people enjoy the memories of their single life, so much in fact, that it depresses them to think that one day they will be married. Others can't get over reminiscing about the ex and reflecting on how things would have turned out had they done certain things in the relationship or had the ex did some things differently for them.
Three. Your Partner's Family
You don't get along with anyone on your mate's side of the family. They invite you to family events and you never want to attend for a variety of reasons. There are more than a select few in your partner's family who are critical of you to your face and behind your back. When you tell your mate about their behavior, he or she doesn't do anything about it.
When you and your partner make plans to do something together, he or she has to always include someone from his or her family. Your mate's family often call or drop by at strange hours of the night. When you tell your partner how this makes you feel, he or she defends their actions and argues with you about it.
Whenever your partner's family is in trouble he or she is always bailing them out. When you tell your partner how this makes you feel and how this affects items being bought for your own home, he or she finds excuses for why they feel what they did is the "right thing to do or "don't worry over it we will be blessed."
Four. Employment
You or your partner can't maintain a steady job. In addition, you may not be happy with your career and education. Without being at peace with those issues, you may not be satisfied with the money you make either. There are some people who can't seem to make up their mind where they would like to work and have a problem committing to any job.
Five. Children
You don't want a family, but your partner is open to the possibility. When your partner brings up this subject you may be the one who becomes emotional about it. Then again, he or she might be. If so, you definitely don't want to commit to them for the rest of your life if the two of you can't agree on this subject. If you know you can't afford it right now, don't get married to someone who thinks that you can at this time. Most of all, if you or your partner has unresolved issues with how your parents treated you, put off having children until you are at peace with your past.
Six. Bad Habits
You have bad habits you can't seem to quit. Partners who stay out all night and come home whenever they feel like it will not all of a sudden just stop their inconsiderate behavior just because you got married. If you or your partner makes plans to enjoy life without the other on a regular basis, why bother getting married?
Continuing to smoke, drink or do drugs when your partner has asked you to quit is definitely a sign you need to put off marriage.
Spending money you know you don't have on things you can't afford will cause future arguments, so don't get married until you have a budget that you can follow on a consistent basis.
You can prevent a future divorce if you don't ignore the signs that you see in the present. Marriage is just as so many have described, "Work." It can be enjoyable work or just a job, it's up to you to decide which you will choose. Build a foundation now that will last a lifetime for you and your partner by doing what you can to better yourself, before you get married!
Nicholl McGuire
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