Get Over the Past But Don't Deny the Truth - Relationships

He was there for you back in the day.  She had done much for you way back when.  But lately things don't look very good because there is far too much arguing.  You start to forget about the positives of the past and you ponder much on why the relationship is just not going to make it in the future.

You might need to sit with your social circle and hammer out some details about YOU!  Notice I didn't mention your partner.  A lot of what we go through has much to do with us.  We have issues that go beyond just the minor infraction that caused a disagreement in the first place.  Sometimes we have personal desires to just move on--break up.  However, we self-deceive.  We tell ourselves we want to remain in toxic relationships when we really do not.  We notice the emptiness, the lack of appreciation from a partner, the declining attraction between one another and more early on in relationships, but refuse to do anything about those moments.

So many couples just don't want to get over the past.  They just can't go beyond the pain, so rather than focus on building themselves up and staying positive, they rather tear one another down.  When you notice a repeated pattern of misery, anger, tepidness, etc, talk with your partner.  If he or she doesn't acknowledge your pain, no worries.  You can get through this!  Problem solve by continuing to focus on you and your healing.  Ask yourself, "What is best for me?"

The sooner you realize what hurts rather than ignore the red alert signs that something is indeed wrong within and around you, the better.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of books like: When Mothers Cry, Say Goodbye to Dad, What Else Can I do on the Internet, Too Much Too Soon Internet Dating Blues and many others.  See here.

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