When You Know You Are Headed for Breakup...
Living together or living apart? You aren't ready to pack just yet those things you left over his or her house or those things you brought with you when you moved in together. You also aren't ready to announce to the world you are single despite fantasizing about it often. But what you are ready for is that slow mental break up.
Some of you know what I am talking about because you are in it right now. You have sounded the alarm enough times through all those, "Let's talk" conversations. You said things like, "I hope that we can do XYZ to improve the relationship." Chances are you didn't really mean it. You may have also said, "We really ought to make some changes here and there." So you put some effort, but not much. Then you threw in, "I sincerely do have feelings for you..." But, you know this person is not your "one" anymore.
Maybe your partner was listening during your feel-good speeches, but obviously not close enough because it is still business as usual with this person. He or she is still doing those things you asked him or her not to do. The minor irritations are now pains. Lately, your mind has been headed toward that place we call, "Break up."
So what is mental break up like these days despite still being in a physical relationship? Well for starters, you know you aren't in love. You rather not ever make love to this person again. The excuses to avoid being intimate come more frequently. You also find that just looking at him or her can be too much. Your eyes begin to wander and you feel like anyone would be better than the person you are with now. You get along enough with him or her to get some things accomplished around your living quarters, but that's about it. You might even make a couple's appearance here and there, just to throw people off. But a future together? Well these days, that is out of the question!
Your best conversations with this person is when you are talking about important things because you have to, not because you really care much about conversing with him or her. What really concerns you is no longer any of his or her business. You save those conversations for family and friends. Whether your soon-to-be ex knows it or not, your mind has checked out. You are officially broken up. Now all you have to do is get your feet to agree.
Some of you know what I am talking about because you are in it right now. You have sounded the alarm enough times through all those, "Let's talk" conversations. You said things like, "I hope that we can do XYZ to improve the relationship." Chances are you didn't really mean it. You may have also said, "We really ought to make some changes here and there." So you put some effort, but not much. Then you threw in, "I sincerely do have feelings for you..." But, you know this person is not your "one" anymore.
Maybe your partner was listening during your feel-good speeches, but obviously not close enough because it is still business as usual with this person. He or she is still doing those things you asked him or her not to do. The minor irritations are now pains. Lately, your mind has been headed toward that place we call, "Break up."
So what is mental break up like these days despite still being in a physical relationship? Well for starters, you know you aren't in love. You rather not ever make love to this person again. The excuses to avoid being intimate come more frequently. You also find that just looking at him or her can be too much. Your eyes begin to wander and you feel like anyone would be better than the person you are with now. You get along enough with him or her to get some things accomplished around your living quarters, but that's about it. You might even make a couple's appearance here and there, just to throw people off. But a future together? Well these days, that is out of the question!
Your best conversations with this person is when you are talking about important things because you have to, not because you really care much about conversing with him or her. What really concerns you is no longer any of his or her business. You save those conversations for family and friends. Whether your soon-to-be ex knows it or not, your mind has checked out. You are officially broken up. Now all you have to do is get your feet to agree.
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